What's The Matter With The Song He's Singing?
Can't You Tell That It's Pretty Lame?
After Listening To A Couple Albums
Well It All Starts To Sound The Same.
So We Tried To Change His Musical Style.
He Tossed All His Albums In The Circular File.
Famous Sound, Punk Sound, Breaking Ground, All Around,
It's Still Billy Joel To Me.

What's The Matter With The Tune He's Writing?
Well You Know It's Gonna Be A Smash.
It's So Nice When You're A Big Name Artist,
'cause No Matter If It Sounds Like Trash.
Now Everybody Thinks The New Wave Is Super.
Just Ask Linda Rondstat, Or Even Alice Cooper.
It's A Big Hit, Isn't It, Even If It's A Piece Of -- JUNK,
It's Still Billy Joel To Me.

Oh, It Doesn't Matter What The Critics Say About Him,
'cause He Doesn't Worry How They Feel.
When Your Records Sell A Million
{they Don't Know If You're Just Whinin'/your Last One's Goin' Plat'num}
You Don't Worry 'bout Your Next Meal,
'cause Money's No Big Deal.

Maybe He Should Dye His Hair Bright {green/pink}
And Stick A Safety Pin Through His Cheeks.
Then He'd Really Fit The New Wave Image,
But He Couldn't Sit Down For Weeks!
Don't You Know About The Record Business, Honey?
You Gotta Be Trendy If You Wanna Make Some Money!
Everybody's Sayin' That He Sure Sounds Funny,
But It's Still Billy Joel To Me!

(accordion Solo...)
(If You Listen Closely Here, You Can Hear Someone Yell "All Right
Alfie!")

I Can Hardly Wait For His Next Album,
Well I Bet It's Gonna Be The Rage.
Buy A Ticket To His Next Concert,
Well I Wonder What He'll Do On Stage.
It Might Be Disco And It Might Be The Blues,
Or Maybe Even Something Like The B-52's.
But The Hand-clap, Baker's-snap, Even If It's Mindless Rap
It's Still Billy Joel To Me

Everybody's Sayin' That He Sure Sounds Funny,
But It's Still Billy Joel To Me.