About A Maid I'll Sing A Song

Sing Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

About A Maid I'll Sing A Song

Who Didn't Have Her Family Long

Not Only Did She Do Them Wrong

She Did Everyone Of Them In, Them In

She Did Everyone Of Them In.



One Morning In A Fit Of Pique

Sing Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

One Morning In A Fit Of Pique

She Drowned Her Father In The Creek

The Water Tasted Bad For A Week

And We Had To Make Do With Gin, With Gin

We Had To Make Do With Gin.



Her Mother She Could Never Stand

Sing Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

Her Mother She Could Never Stand

And So A Cyanide Stew She Planned

The Mother Died With A Spoon In Her Hand

And Her Face In A Hideous Grin, A Grin

Her Face In A Hideous Grin.



She Set Her Sister's Hair On Fire.

Sing Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

She Set Her Sister's Hair On Fire.

And As The Smoke And Flame Rose Higher

Danced Around The Funeral Pyre

Playing A Violin, Olin,

Playing A Violin.



She Weighted Her Brother Down With Stones.

Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

She Weighted Her Brother Down With Stones

And Sent Him Off To Davey Jones.

All They Ever Found Were Some Bones

And Occasional Pieces Of Skin, Of Skin

Occasional Pieces Of Skin.



One Day When She Had Nothing To Do

Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

One Day When She Had Nothing To Do,

She Cut Her Baby Brother In Two

And Served Him Up As An Irish Stew

And Invited The Neighbors In, Bors In

Invited The Neighbors In



And When At Last The Police Came By

Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

And When At Last The Police Came By,

Her Little Pranks She Did Not Deny

Do To So She Would Have Had To Lie

And Lying She Knew Was A Sin, A Sin

Lying She Knew Was A Sin.



My Tragic Tale I Won't Prolong

Sing Rika-ti-tika-ti-tin

My Tragic Tale I Won't Prolong

And If You Do Not Enjoy My Song

You've Yourselves To Blame If It's Too Long

You Should Never Have Let Me Begin, Begin.

You Should Never Have Let Me Begin.