Conversations With My Bathroom Mirror

Are Never The Same

As When You're Standing Here

I'm Chickenshit Out On A Brave Frontier,

That Teenage Wasteland

So Begins The Jack Slap Cheer

Your Mom Aint Home

She's Out Strippin For Your Education

Your Dad's Out Marchin For The NRA

I'm So Damn Bored

I'm Crawlin Out Of My Skin

The Devil's Got More Room To Play



This Town Gets So Boring

When You're Not Scoring

It Gets So Boring And You Live Right Up The Street

16 Summers, Let's Make One Complete



We're All Jack Slaps Here

Jack Slaps, With Jack Slap Fears

All Lost On The Same Frontier

So Face The Facts And Sing The Cheer

Your Dad Stepped Out

He's .09 And On The Highway

Singin Along With The Rolling Stones

I Can't Get No Satisfaction

Damn, Ain't That True

Bring Me Home, Don't Send Me Home



This Town Gets So Boring

When You're Not Scoring