In A Very Large Factory I Belong

And I Work The Night Shift All Year Long

Old Freddy On A Chainsaw Lost His Feet

Thinking 'bout A Blonde He'll Never Meet

Tried To Take His Life Again The Other Week

Keep Your Chin Up, Haven't A Care 'ave You?

Just Join The Party, Allegiance I Swear



Eee What's The Matter With Arthur Royal?

I'll Go And Top Up His Batteries And Check The Oil

Young Arthur Blew A Fuse Two Days Ago,

Set Himself Alight, You Didn't Know

Nearly Burnt Us Down The Twit Just Had To Go

Take Your Chances, Live On Hot Air (wouldn't You?)

Chance Of Promotion, I'll Take That Chair



Dreaming Of Golden Sands And Palm Trees

I Said File These Quickly And Then Staple These

Get Yourself Altered Undo The Seam, And Get Back Just

In Time For Tea (and Don't Be Late Mind)



Nobody's Perfect Least Of All Me

Married The Job At Age 23

Just Keep My Nose Clean Egg Chips And Beans

I'm Always Full Of Steam



...I Could Never Afford To Go To Butlins

...But I Did Manage To Go To Majorca Once

...Wish I Hadn't Bothered...

...Past The Entrance, By I Bored Myself

...Who Are All These People In My Office, Anyway?

...Who Are They? Where Do They Come From, Do Y'know Them?