[Ivy:]
Call The Justice Of The Peace,
But Don't Tell Him Our Names,
Don't Put Out A Press Release,
Or Mention Baseball Games.

[Michael:]
Book The Nearest Bridal Suite,
One Room Will Suit Us Fine,
For The Desk Clerk That We Meet,
The Only Autograph We'll Sign Is,

[Both:]
Mr And Mrs Smith,
Simply The Folks Next Door,

[Michael:]
People Without A Single Clue What
An Agent Or Grip Is For

[Ivy:]
Yes,

[Both:]
Nothing Can Beat The View,
When As Far As The Eye Can See, There's

[Michael:]
No One But Mrs,

[Ivy:]
No One But Mr,

[Both:]
Smith And Me.

[Michael:]
For A Home The Man Provides,
A Cottage Built For Two,
We'll Check The Small Town Classifieds,
Variety Won't Do.

[Ivy:]
Then We'll Move To Mainstream USA
And Sign The Deed Of Trust,
The Mailbox At Our Hideaway,
Will Tell The Whole Wide World That We're Just,

[Both:]
Mr And Mrs Smith,
Merely The Folks Next Door,

[Michael:]
People Who Use Their Kitchen Each Night,

[Ivy:]
And Never Been In Toots Shor,

[Michael:]
Yeah,

[Both:]
Nothing Can Beat The View,
For As Far As The Eye Can See, There's

[Michael:]
No One But Mr,

[Ivy:]
No One But Mrs,

[Both:]
Smith And Me.

[Both:]
No Early Calls,
No Big Premieres,
No Less Romantic Theme,
We'll Spend The Nights,
Making Our Own,
Little League Baseball Team,

[Both:]
We're No One You've Ever Seen,

[Ivy:]
Movie Stars Don't Live Anywhere Here,
Except On The Local Drive-in Screen,

[Both:]
Yes,
I'd Gladly Disappear,
If It Might Guarantee A View Of,

[Michael:]
No One But Mr,

[Ivy:]
No One But Mrs,

[Both:]
Smith And You.