In The Cool Shade Of The Banana Tree

On The Rugged Trail Toward The Balcony

A Child Of The Twentieth Century

A Dried Up Goliath And A Weasel Named Fee


Far Away In Another Place

A Fading Beauty Named Milly Grace

A Gospel Singer With Pocks On Her Face

And A Bamboo Cane To Help Her Keep The Pace


Fee Was A Buddhist Prodigy

Long Past The Age Of Maturity

Someday He Knew It Would Set Him Free

Like It Did For Floyd The Chimpanzee


Oh, Fee, You're Trying To Live A Life

That's Completely Free.

You're Racing With The Wind

You're Flirting With Death

So Have A Cup Of Coffee

And Catch Your Breath


Fee First Met Milly In A Bar In Peru

His Heart Was Jumping Like A Kangaroo

Like A Beast In A Cage In An Old Dutch Zoo

It Was Hopping And Thumping In Wooden Shoes


But Floyd Was Jealous And Alone

He Wanted Milly For His Own

A Desperate Craving In His Bones

"Their Love", He Said, "I Will Not Condone."


Then One Day On A Ship To Quebec

Floyd Found Milly On A Lover's Trek

He Picked Up A Bottle And Broke Off The Neck

It Sliced Through The Air, And Fee Hit The Deck


Oh, Fee, You're Trying To Live A Life

That's Completely Free

You Want To Stay With Milly

Until You're Dead

But You Just Got A Bottle

Upside Your Head


Milly Turned And Began To Scream At Floyd

She Said "You Think You're Pretty Mean"

And Though She Was As Thin As A Small String Bean

She Slammed Him In The Face With A Nectarine


Floyd Fell Back Over The Edge Of The Ship

Till He Hung From The Rail By His Fingertip

Milly Said, "Floyd I'll Make You Lose Your Grip

With This Tiny Piece Of Paper I Can Make You Slip"


So Milly Took That Paper And Did The Deed

Floyd Hit The Water With Astonishing Speed

And As The Sharks Circled And Began To Feed

Milly Knew Her Weasel Was Finally Free


Oh, Fee, You're Trying To Live A Life

That's Completely Free

Floyd Is Dead; He's Nothing But A Ripple

Cause Milly Took That Paper

And Sliced Him On The Nipple