I Was Standin At A Big Hotel
Wishin Everybody Well
But If Anybody Paid Me Any Mind It Was Hard To Tell
A Big Policeman On His Beat
Pulled His Pistol And He Pointed At Me
Lookin Down The Barrel I Could See The Gates Of Hell
I Was Standin' At A Big Hotel

So I Went Walkin Down The Avenue
Lookin For Someone Who Looked Like You
But I Never Saw A Face That Seemed To Ring A Bell
So I Stopped Beside The Five And Dime
Just Window-shoppin And Wastin Time
When Along Came A Gal Who Sold Me All She Had To Sell
She Left Me Standin' At A Big Hotel
I Lost My Mind In The Wilds Of Hollywood
I Did Some Time In The Shadows Where I Stood
I Let The Cards Fall Where They Fell...
And I Found Myself Standin' At A Big Hotel
A Blind Lady With A Big Tin Cup
Had Her Pencils All Sharpened Up
She Was Standin In The Door Just To See What She Could Sell
But Nobody Bought A Thing All Night
They Thought She Was A Pitiful Sight
Lord Help The Gal Who Helps Herself
Standin' At A Big Hotel

Long Gone Are Horse N Buggy Days
Big Limousines Are Here To Stay
And When They See You To The Door
They Want Something For Their Help
But I Saw Somebody Make A Little Slip
He Only Left The Kid A Ten Cent Tip
You Shoulda Heard What I Heard When I Heard That Bell Boy Yell...
Standin' At A Big Hotel

Lord Lord What's The Matter With Me
To Pay So Much For The Song I Sing
When All I Was Doin Was Singin It To Myself
Like Standin In A Stagnant Stream
With Nothin In The World Left To Dream
I Was Dyin At The Bottom Of A Dried Up Wishin Well
I Was Standin' At A Big Hotel

Well I Know What You're Thinkin Today
I Can Feel It Though I'm Miles Away
Everybody Knows I Love My Southern Belle
But From The East To The Wild Wild West
They Say A Bird In The Hand Is Best
So Here I Am With A Bird Dog And A Bottle Of Muscatel
Standin' At A Big Hotel