(Host Intro)


Let's Meet Contestant #1


He's A Schitzophrenic Serial Killer Clown


Who Says Women Love His Sexy Smile.


Let's Find Out If His Charm Will Work On Sharon.


Sharon, What's Your Question?





(Sharon)


Contestant #1, I Believe First Impressions Last Forever,


So Let's Say You Were To Come Over To My Parents' House


And Have Dinner With Me And My Family.


Tell Me What You'd Do To Make That First Impression Really Stay.





Let's See, Hmm, Well I'd Have To Think About It


I Might Show Up In A Tux, Ha! But I Doubt It.


I'd Probably Just Show Up Naked Like I Always Do


And Look Your Mama In The Eye And Tell Her Fuck You!


Hurry Up Bitch I'm Hungry, I Smell Spaghetti,


I'd Pinch Her Limpy Ass And Tell Her Get The Food Ready!


Your Dad Would Probably Start Trippin And Get Me Pissed


I'd Have To Walk Up And Bust Him In His Fuckin Lips!


It's Dinner Time, We're Hearin' Grace From Your Mother


I Pull A 40 Out And Pour Some For Your Little Brother


I'm Standing Staring At Your Sister, I'll Tell You This


You Know For Only 13 She Got Some Big Tits!


After That, Your Dad Would Try To Jump Again


And Only This Time I'd Put The 40 To His Chin!


After Your Mom Does The Dishes And The Silverwear,


I'd Dry Fuck Her Till I Nut In My Underwear!!!!





(Host)


Now Let's Meet Contestant #2,


He's A Psychopathic Derranged Crackhead Freak


Who Works In The Dark Carnival.


He Says Women Call Him Stretch Nuts.


Sharon, Let's Hear Your Question.





(Sharon)


I Like A Man Who's Not Afraid To Show His True Emotions,,


A Man Who Expresses Himself In His Own Special Way


#2, If You Fell In Love With Me, Exactly How Would You Let Me Know?





First Of All, I Could Never Love You


You Sound Like A Richy Bitch, Yo Fuck You!


But If I Did, I'd Probably Show You That I Care,


By Takin All These Other Motha Fuckers Outta Here!


I'd Go Through Your Phonebook And Whack Em All


And Find Contestant #1 And Break His Fuckin Jaw!


Anyon