I Chatted Up A Blue Eye,
One Dizzy Friday Night,
There Was A Cherry Drop Who Didn't Wanna Stop.

I Met A Dandelion,
I Met A Lemon Cloud,
I Saw A Pornographic Phonograph Spin 'round.

Chorus:
But There Ain't No One,
Who Turns Me Like You Do,
And There Ain't No One,
Who Does It Like, Does It Like You (do),
And When We're Goin',
I Like The Way You Move,
There Ain't No One,
Ain't No One.

Talked To A Digital Trick,
Who's Nicknamed 'Appleseed,'
Who Gets Down At The Abbey On Both Knees To Please.

I Met A Razor Mouth,
A Little Vampire,
A Little Battery Who Never Gets Tired.

Chorus

There Ain't No One Who Compares,
There Ain't No One Keeps Me High,
There Ain't No One Makes Me Stare,
Like I Can't Believe My Eyes.
There Ain't No One Makes Me Weak,
Hardly Speak, Find A Drink So I Can Think,
There Ain't No One,
Ain't No One.

Chorus