Bert: "Ahhhh....ahhhh...."

Ernie: "Hey Bert, What's Wrong?"

Bert: "I Think I'm Going To Sneeze."

Ernie: "Bert, You Can't Sneeze, You Don't Have A Hanky. You Can't Sneeze Without A Hanky."

Bert: "I Know, Can You Go Get One, Ernie? Please Hurry!"

Ernie: "Wait Right There. (he Runs Off, Returns With A Large Hanky) Okay You Can Sneeze Now."

Bert: "Ahh, Ahhh, Just Hold It Right There, Ernie."

Ernie: "Just Sneeze Any Way You Want To."

Bert: "Hold It That Way, Aaaahhhh, AAAhhhhh, I Can Feel It Coming, AAAAAHHHH, It's Going To Be A Big One--AAACCCCCHHHHOOOOoooo!!! (Bert Buries His Nose In The Hanky, But When He Lifts His Head, His Nose Is Still In Ernie's Hand!) (nasally) That's Better! Thanks, Ernie."

Ernie: "Uh, Bert? (taps Him On The Shoulder, Shows Him His Nose.) This Here's Your Nose. Looks Like You Sneezed Your Nose Off."

Bert: (nasal) "Rats! (pause) Ernie, Can You Keep This Quiet? Draw The Drapes And...(softly) And Put My Nose Back On!"

Ernie: "Why Of Course, Kehehehe! That's What Friends Are For, Aren't They, Kehehehe?! They Put Their Friends' Noses Back On!"

Bert: (nasal) "Ernie, Cut The Clowning, And Just Put My Nose Back On!"

Ernie: "Okay, Okay." (Bert Bends Down, Ernie Sticks It Way Over On The Right Side Of His Face, Then Starts Laughing Again)

Bert: "Ernie, What Are You Doing? That's Not Where My Nose Goes!"

Ernie: "Kehehehe! You Should See Where Your Nose Is, Bert, Kehehehe!"

Bert: "I Can See It, Yeah, Out Of My Left Eye I Can See It! C'mon, Ernie, You Know Where It Goes!"

Ernie: "Okay, Just A Minute." (Ernie Pulls Bert's Nose Off And Then Sticks It Above Bert's Eyebrows, Starts Laughing Again.)

Bert: "Is That Your Idea Of Where My Nose Goes? You Know Where It Belongs!"

Ernie: "Kehehehe, It Looks Pretty Funny Right Where It Is, Kehehehe!"

Bert: "Ho-ho. C'mon, Ernie, You Know What To Do, Do It Right!" (Bert Bends Down Again, And Ernie Moves Bert's Nose Down Below Bert's Chin, Then Laughes Some More)

Ernie: "Kehehehe! You Should See Where It Is Now!"

Bert: "ERNIE! C'mon Now, Quit Clowning Around, Do It Right!"

Ernie: "Okay, Hang On. (Ernie Finally Puts Bert's Nose Where It Belongs) There!"

Bert: "Thanks, Ern. (pause) Oh No!"

Ernie: "What's The Matter?"

Bert: "I Think I'm Going To Sneeze Again!"