The Chocolate Song



When Your Feet Feel Like They're Made Of Stone And Your Bones Are Full Of Lead

Muscles Feel Like They're Galvanized And There's Concrete In Your Head

When Your Blood Flows Like Molasses, You Can't Add Two And Two

The Top Looks Like The Bottom And Orange Looks Like Blue.



When You Feel Like You're Hung Over But You Didn't Drink Last Night

Your Eyes Look Like A Road Map And Your Underwear Feels Tight

Gravity Seems Multiplied And Your Organs Are On Strike

You're In Sudden Death Overtime And The Wheels Are Off Your Bike



You Need Some Chocolate, Soft Creamy Chocolate

Some Chocolate Ice Cream, And Chocolate Mousse

Some Chocolate Cheesecake, Bavarian Chocolate

Bring On The Chocolate, You Need A Boost.



They Say It Gives Us Pimples, It's Addictive And It Stains

It Makes Us Fat And Hyper, And Clogs Up All Our Veins

It Puts Migraines In Our Noggins And It's Worse Than Cigarettes

But All Those Things Are Easier Than Having A Chocolate Fit.



Now There's Lots Of Medical Evidence To Support Our Point Of View

It's Not All Psychological, Good News For Me And You

It Affects Our Seritonin, Which Reduces Aches And Pains

And Does All Kinds Of Cool Things To The Chemistry Of Our Brains.



Good Old Chocolate, Dark Chewy Chocolate

Nanaimo Snack Bars, Chocolate Eclairs

Hot Chocolate Sundae, Sweet Chocolate Milkshake

Bring On The Chocolate, We Need A Boost.



Now They Say We're Chocoholics And We Have A Legitimate Beef

That We Should Lobby Government To Get Funding For Relief

Now If You Can Keep A Secret, Just Leave It Up To Me.

I'll Take The Funds And Build Us A Chocolate Factory.



And If Life Should Get Too Heavy And We Decide To End It All

We Won't Do It With A Pistol, Drugs Or Alcohol

We'll Just Take A Thousand Dollars To A Nice Dessert Café

Eat A Dump Truck Load Of Chocolate And Do Ourselves Away.



Cause We Love Chocolate, Mouth Watering Chocolate

Bla