Well, I Woke Up In The Morning

There's Frogs Inside My Socks

Your Mama, She's A-hidin'

Inside The Icebox

Your Daddy Walks In Wearin'

A Napoleon Bonaparte Mask

Then You Ask Why I Don't Live Here

Honey, Do You Have To Ask?



Well, I Go To Pet Your Monkey

I Get A Face Full Of Claws

I Ask Who's In The Fireplace

And You Tell Me Santa Claus

The Milkman Comes In

He's Wearing A Derby Hat

Then You Ask Why I Don't Live Here

Honey, How Come You Have To Ask Me That?



Well, I Asked For Something To Eat

I'm Hungry As A Hog

So I Get Brown Rice, Seaweed

And A Dirty Hot Dog

I've Got A Hole

Where My Stomach Disappeared

Then You Ask Why I Don't Live Here

Honey, I Gotta Think You're Really Weird.



Your Grandpa's Cane

It Turns Into A Sword

Your Grandma Prays To Pictures

That Are Pasted On A Board

Everything Inside My Pockets

Your Uncle Steals

Then You Ask Why I Don't Live Here

Honey, I Can't Believe That You're For Real.



Well, There's Fist Fights In The Kitchen

They're Enough To Make Me Cry

The Mailman Comes In

Even He's Gotta Take A Side

Even The Butler

He's Got Something To Prove

Then You Ask Why I Don't Live Here

Honey, How Come You Don't Move?