Bert Is Examining A Cookie In His Hand

Bert: "Mmmmmmm, Mmmm."

Ernie: (barging In) "A Cookie?! Oh Boy A Cookie! I Love Cookies And Oh Boy Am I Hungry!"

(He Grabs Bert's Hand And Starts Bringing The Cookie To His Mouth. Bert Angrily Stops Him.)

Bert: "Ernie, Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-HOLD IT!"

Ernie: (tries Again) "But It's A Cookie And I'm Hungry And--"

Bert: (jerks Away) "Ernie, This Is MY Cookie. I've Been Saving It All Day Just For ME."

Ernie: "Oh But, Bert, You Wouldn't Share The Cookie With Your Best Friend?"

Bert: "Ernie, I've Been Saving It; This Cookie Is For ME."

Ernie: "Oh But Bert, If This Were My Cookie, I Would Share It With You."

Bert: (skeptical) "No You Wouldn't."

(Bert Starts To Eat The Cookie, Ernie Stops Him)

Ernie: "Oh But Bert, If This Were My Cookie, Bert If This Were My Cookie, I'd Be Glad To Share It With You." (abruptly He Snatches It Away From Bert)

Bert: "Ernie!"

Ernie: "Just A Minute, Bert, Just A Minute."

Bert: "Ernie, That's My Cookie!"

Ernie: "Oh But Bert, If This Were My Cookie, I'd Gladly Share It With You. Just Ask Me."

Bert: "Ernie, That's--"

Ernie: "No, Just Ask Me."

Bert: "This Is Silly. (forced) Ernie, Would You Share That Cookie With Me? Augh!"

Ernie: "Why I'd Be Glad To! (He Breaks It In Half, Gives One Piece To Bert And Gobbles Down The Other Half. [Did He Get Lessons From Cookie Monster?) See, Bert? I Told You I'd Share The Cookie With You. Isn't That Better?" (leaves)

Bert: (standing Bewildered With The Half-cookie) "I Don't Understand ..."

(Ernie Pops Back, Asking): "Say Bert, Would You Share That Half-cookie With Me--"

Bert: "AAAAUUUUUGGGGHH! Leave Me Alone!"